Adam Grant explains "Give and Take" to Knowledge Wharton:

You could anchor this at two extremes: the takers and the givers. The takers are people who, when they walk into an interaction with another person, are trying to get as much as possible from that person and contribute as little as they can in return, thinking that's the shortest and most direct path to achieving their own goals.

At the other end of the spectrum, we have this strange breed of people that I call "givers."

It's not about donating money or volunteering necessarily, but looking to help others by making an introduction, giving advice, providing mentoring or sharing knowledge, without any strings attached. These givers actually prefer to be on the contributing end of an interaction.

Very few of us are purely takers or purely givers. Most of us hover somewhere in between. That brings us to the third group of people, who are matchers. A matcher is somebody who tries to maintain an even balance of give and take. If I help you, I expect you to help me in return. [They] keep score of exchanges, so that everything is fair and really just.

I also found this profound: 

The advice that Mahatma Gandhi gave her, in the columns of the magazine that he edited, was, "Don't look at how he treats you. Look at how he treats his servants." I think that's very, very telling because with somebody whom he was trying to impress, obviously he would be very well-behaved.

But a true sign of character is how you treat people who are vulnerable.

Adam Grant's Today Show appearance was really quite special:

http://www.today.com/video/today/51490776#51490776

New York Times:

http://www.nytimes.com/2013/03/31/magazine/is-giving-the-secret-to-getting-ahead.html?_r=0&pagewanted=all

Time Magazine:

http://ideas.time.com/2013/04/10/viewpoint-nice-guys-can-win-at-work/

Forbes:

http://www.forbes.com/sites/susanadams/2013/04/01/7-ways-that-generosity-can-lead-to-success/

I like this paragraph from Susan Adams' Forbes article:

“Chunk” your giving.  Grant cites a study of people who performed five random acts of kindness every week for six weeks. Those who concentrated their giving into a single day each week felt much happier at the end of the experiment than did those who dispersed their giving throughout the week. Grant calls this “chunking” as opposed to “sprinkling.” One reason Callahan felt rewarded by her volunteer work is she did it in intense periods on the weekends.

And it's also worth perusing Adam Grant's YouTube channel:

http://www.youtube.com/user/dadam813

The three universal styles of interaction:

Avoiding the Doormat effect:

Quietly leading:

I do highly recommend Adam Grant's book "Give and Take":

Buy it now: http://www.amazon.com/Give-Take-Revolutionary-Approach-Success/dp/0670026557/

Makes a fine gift!

And no, I'm not making commissions.

But I did write this review:

http://www.amazon.com/review/R2P8MXWW48VC29/ref=cm_cr_pr_perm?ie=UTF8&ASIN=0670026557&linkCode=&nodeID=&tag=

Here's more about what the book is about:

Adam Grant is for real. I have had some email correspondence with him re Boris Groysberg (in Chapter 3) and a blog I did on Sheryl Sandberg's book  bit.ly/10gzssB. I don't know quite how he does it but he is a real giver with great insights. Would love to sit in on one of his classes.

Adam Rifkin, we may be related way back. Just depends on how the name got translated when your predecessors got off the boat. We were in the Ukraine around Kiev.

Jack, cool. My ancestors came to New York from Vladivostok in the 1880s.

The Boris Groysberg story is a good one!

I wonder if any of his classes are available online.

Boris's stuff is not available yet on-line. I go up there at least once a year for the case I am in both with Boris and at the Law School. He's on his way to Mumbai to conduct a three day session with Indian finance executives. Amazing person and a giver himself.

That's great. The message of giving seems to spread more every day.

Impressive. I am in awe of the time management skills necessary! 

Me too. I have trouble just keeping up with the things I *HAVE* to get done.