Sign up FAST! Login

Young People Who Sacrifice Romance for 'Unencumbered Striving', by Conor Friedersdorf, The Atlantic

Stashed in: Women, @troutgirl, Young Americans, #love, inequality, life

To save this post, select a stash from drop-down menu or type in a new one:

"After interviewing 60 women at the University of Pennsylvania over the course of a year, Kate Taylor of the New York Times posits that "hookup culture" isn't just driven by young men. It's also "a functional strategy for today's hard-charging and ambitious young women, allowing them to have enjoyable sex lives while focusing most of their energy on academic and professional goals."

The article begins with one woman's story.

"I positioned myself in college in such a way that I can't have a meaningful romantic relationship, because I'm always busy," she reflected. "...there are so many other things going on in my life that I find so important that I just, like, can't make time, and I don't want to make time.""

She thinks she's being rational but I believe her priorities are backward.

FIRST enjoy your youth and hopefully find love in doing so.

No one ever said on their deathbed they wish they had worked more. 

you guys are speaking from the other side, through the lens of retrospective.we had the same kind of 'rationale' when we were in school, and we learned all that we needed later will happen for these kids.

this is an example of the media putting on record a group whose ideals change wildly during said formative 20s.

You know why people on their deathbeds don't say they wish they'd worked more, Panda? Because those who were successful worked about the right amount by definition, and those who weren't rationalized it long ago. It's called CONFIRMATION BIAS.

That said, I have things to say about this topic! There is a reason that fertility rates show something like a straight-line decline with education and prosperity, regardless of factors like ethnicity, religion, and government incentives. And guess what, the reason is that women increasingly see men as BURDENS rather than meal tickets. Women who have the choice would increasingly rather work for themselves and their children without adding the additional cost of supporting a man to that equation. And let's face it, men being what they are you can always (in Amy Schumer's elegantly crass formulation) "catch a dick" when the need arises without buying that dick's problems in any permanent way (condoms, people!).

Waylon, I hear what you're saying that these girls are very young and might fundamentally change as they age. But the data say that it's not happening yet. Millennials are marrying less frequently and later than ever. And let's face it, people's previous habits are often predictive... so someone who has previously lived an achievement-oriented rather than romantic-oriented life is likely to return to that if romance doesn't work out.

hah word...

comparatively harder to "lure a ____" or at least, all the standards have changed...

You May Also Like: