This is Why You Should Always Poop Before Boarding a Private Jet
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It's hard to feel bad for someone who is flying on a private jet, even if they're suffering:
“Excuse me, where is the bathroom, because I don’t see a door?” I ask while still devoting considerable energy to fighting off what starts to feel like someone shook a seltzer bottle and shoved it up my ass. She looks at me, bemused, and says, “Well, we don’t really have one per se.” She continues, “Technically, we have one, but it’s really just for emergencies. Don’t worry, we’re landing shortly anyway.”
Rule of thumb is to poop before ANY flight. Or long car ride.