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#Love: I’m Single, Therefore I Tinder | TechCrunch

Stashed in: Girls and Boys, Brilliant Insight, Snapchat, Cultural Norms, Tinder, Tinder!

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In the game of Tinder, you win or you get bored and give up. That is pretty much standard operating procedure for anyone with a smartphone and a libido.

But what if you’re bad at Tinder?

Naturally, I can’t solve all your problems. But experts from across the country, as well as Tinder’s own Sean Rad, have hooked us up with some solid advice.

Tinder represents a new phase in the era of online dating. At one point, the only real online dating options were eHarmony and, and their rich, divorced customers were usually looking for something more serious. Then came OkCupid, asking you to browse photos in the cold blue light of your computer.

Now, we’re in the age of Tinder. The Tinder Years. Not only is the app free, but it tries its best to mimic the experience of perusing hotties in a bar, as opposed to surfing pictures on the web like a creep. And that’s the dream, right? To look across a crowded room and see eyes glaring back at you, silently undressing you until numbers are exchanged, and then saliva, and then maybe some token of trust and monogamy. 

Very accurate explanation of Tinder that inadvertently explains the issue with it.

The people who do best on there are the ones who are ALREADY doing the best at the bar scene: young, good-looking, extroverted, flirty, mainstream in their tastes, and shall we say ready to enjoy a level of social interaction involving drinking, bar games, dancing/karaoke, and watching sports on TV with groups of people. (I am not saying this in a snotty, superior way either; except for the young and good-looking part, this is me.) If you are one of these people, Tinder just enlarges your scope a little bit -- you can get on there and instead of waiting for a pretty girl to come to the bar, you can invite some to meet you there tonight. Or if you're ALMOST one of these people -- like you're way better at hitting on a girl for the first time by text than in person -- it can help you get past that one little difficult point.

But the real value of online dating isn't for these people! They are basically "winning the game" of offline dating already. Online dating is disproportionately helpful to people who do NOT do well at the club. The less likely you are to find your next dream lover on a barstool, the more value a site like OKCupid or JDate or Farmers Only has to you. In fact I think there is evidence that the less specific you are in what you're looking for -- the more you treat online dating as "just a numbers game" -- the more discontented you will be with the whole process because it just becomes a weird form of shopping without buying.

So why is Tinder so popular then? What I learned working at one of the early social networking sites is that men have a really quite insatiable desire to look at photos of attractive young women. It is a reliable basic of human nature. Doesn't matter if they're young, old, married, single, or what have you -- give a lot of men an endless stream of photos of young women and they will give you an endless stream of views. Tinder is by far the most easily consumed form of photos of nubile ladies invented to date. It makes OKCupid look like a long tedious exercise in READING in comparison!


Despite everything -- or perhaps because of it! -- Tinder keeps growing.