How To Find Happiness: 3 Secrets From Research
Eric Barker stashed this in Diabolical Plans For World Domination
Ask: “What’s my vision of my best possible self?”
When your life is perfect, what is it like? And that can tell you what’s really important to you and what your values are.
Research shows that thinking about your best possible self doesn’t just clarify goals — it can also make you happier just by thinking about it.
“Hedonic Adaptation”is just a fancy way of saying: You can take ANYTHING for granted.
Yes, anything. Researchers looked at people who suffered terrible accidents and ended up in wheelchairs. Guess what? Eventually, they adapted and were happy again. Hooray!
But researchers also looked at lottery winners… Yup, people eventually adapted to that too. Ugh.
We all take things for granted. We never experience something and then BOOM — we’re happy for the rest of our lives.
When we say “I’ll be happy when X happens” we’re just not telling the truth. That great job, that dream wedding, that beautiful baby — none of them is the final key to happiness we think it will be.
Eric Barker summarizes the research-backed happiness wisdom from Sonja:
- Ask “What’s the best version of me?“: This can tell you what you value and what’s missing in your life. Now you know what interests you and can get you closer to that perfect, happy life.
- New! Different! Surprising!: You can and will take anything for granted. So spice up the things that make you happy by adding novelty, variety or surprise.
- Ask “What would I do if this were my last month?”: If you felt you’d never be able to do that fun thing again or see that special someone again, you’d get off your butt. So ask the question — and then do that stuff.
A hug is like a boomerang – you get it back right away.
I’ll be sending out a PDF with more joy-inducing tips from Sonja in my next weekly email. (Including the answer to the one thing you do all the time that kills happiness.) To make sure you get it, sign up for my weekly email here.