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How to use body language to your advantage


Stashed in: @bakadesuyo

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This is what you need to know about your own body language:

  • To be more likable, smile, and use open body movements. No squishing.
  • To be more influential, think about your goals. Upbeat to sell, calm to reduce resistance.
  • To be seen as a leader, think power and warmth. Maintain good posture. Don't be a jerk.
  • To be more attractive, guys should follow the leadership postures and ladies the likable ones. Gender roles are changing so, hey, maybe this will too. But for now, this is what the research seems to point to.

Now some people will turn their nose up at all this and say you should "just be yourself."

You don't want to be a phony. I'm with you. Faking your way through life is a bad idea. Not only is it insincere, it might just kill you. Manipulative narcissists and sociopaths beware — faking smiles can make your heart explode:

The authors examined whether facial expressions of emotion would predict changes in heart function … Those participants who exhibited ischemia showed significantly more anger expressions and nonenjoyment smiles than nonischemics.

So don't be a faker. But sometimes you feel down, cranky or just not yourself. In those cases, a little bit of effort to be a better you can really pay off. Research shows putting your best foot forward actually reveals the real you:

In sum, positive self-presentation facilitates more accurate impressions, indicating that putting one's best self forward helps reveal one's true self.

Not only will it help those around you see the real you but there's an even better result — you'll be happier:

Results generally supported these hypotheses, and suggested that the (best possible self) exercise may be most beneficial for raising and maintaining positive mood.

Don't run around pretending to be James Bond or Jane Bond. But a little work to be the best you that you can be leads to better relationships and a happier life.

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