Willy Wonka is a racist. I'm sorry, but all of these children are WHITE. If Wonka Bars are sold globally, statistically speaking, at least three of these children should be Asian...

But they're not Asian, are they? No. Because Willy Wonka is a racist.

Then, of course, Willy Wonka gets all angry at Augustus Gloop when he jumps into the chocolate river. And Wonka's legion of Oompa Loompas march out with a judgmental tune about gluttony...     

BITCHES, you work at a chocolate factory. You gave up your right to judge fat children when you left Loompaland to mass-produce sugary treats for a deranged hermit.     

Speaking of which, you'll notice — AFTER Augustus almost dies in the chocolate river...     

Wonka calls forth a boat that wouldn't have had enough seats for Augustus and his mother, WHICH MEANS... he KNEW someone wasn't gonna make it.     

IN FACT...by the end of the movie, Wonka gets in a car with room for only FOUR guests. HE KNEW. HE KNEW THE WHOLE TIME. HE KNEW THE OTHER KIDS WOULD DIE.     

Oh...and all that fuss about "contaminating" the Fizzy Lifting Drink tank. Wonka put USED SHOES into a recipe. And then he flips a shit about Charlie touching the walls of the tank with his hands. WTF, WONKA.     

IN CONCLUSION: WONKA IS INSANE. GRANDPA JOE IS A LAZY ASS. AND EVERYBODY IN THIS MOVIE IS A JERK.     

calm down.