• Stewie: Please, tell me why you have a gun!
• Brian: I SAID i don't want talk about it.
• Stewie: But i want to know. Tell me. Come on.
• Brian: No
• Stewie: Come on, Please!
• Brian: [sighs] I keep it in case that i want to commit suicide, okay?
• Stewie: Wow. Oh. Oh my God. You're... You're serious. But why Brian?
• Brian: You wouldn't understand. You're just a kid.
• Stewie: [getting closer to Brian] Well, i could try.
• Brian: I don't know. Sometimes it's all... Too much.
• Stewie: What is?
• Brian: Life! Everything. Having a gun here, knowing there's a way out, it... it helps.
• Stewie: Yes, but a gun... It's so messy! What about pills? Or even hanging yourself is better. At lest you can grow a 1cm or 2 while you're hanging there, of course when they find you would have thouse Illeana Douglas eyes.
• Brian: Hmm
• Stewie: So... Hum, Why the gun?
• Brian: It just seem like the quickest way i guess.
• Stewie: But i don't quite understand why you're so unhappy.
• Brian: Yesterday, when you said that i don't live with purpose, you were right. I don't. What purpose does my life have!
• Stewie: I don't like when you talk like this.
• Brian: It's true, Stewie. Dogs are suppose to live with purpose without even thinking about it, just born like that... But i wasn't! You know, i try to find meaning in my life and i just... can't.
• Stewie: So... is that why we came here? You gonna end it?
• Brian: No, i was just putting money on my christmas account.
• Stewie: God, i need to do one of those.
• Brian: Well, you're the only person i ever told this to. You won't gonna say anything?
• Stewie: I don't know what to say. Wanting to kill yourself, i... Well, i think that is pretty selfish of you!
• Brian: How can this be selfish?
• Stewie: What would i do if you weren't here? Hmm? You're the only one that makes my life bearable!
• Brian: I thought you said i was the best of a bad situation.
• Stewie: I was just trying to hurt you because you hurt me. But the truth is... You're my only friend Brian. If i didn't have you i would be lost!
• Brian: Ah, you would be okay. [Says numb]
• Stewie: No, i wouldn't. I don't really care about anybody else, just you. You're the only one i like.
• Brian: Well... Thanks.
• Stewie: I like you lot. I guess you could say I... really like you. I would... even dare to go a little further, perhaps. I... care a great deal about you. Very great deal. Maybe even... deeper than that. I... I... I love you. I mean, you know, not in like a, "Hey, let's, you know, let's have an underpants party," or whatever grownups do when they're in love, but I mean, I mean, I love you as one loves another person whom one simply cannot do without.
• Brian: Well I... I love you, too, Stewie.
• Stewie: You give my life purpose, and maybe, maybe that's enough. Because that's just about the greatest gift one friend can give another.

Said the Whale ?! Really?