The One Thing You Should Know About How To Deeply Connect With Anyone - Forbes
Michael Simmons stashed this in How To Be A Super Connector
In this article, I interviewed a top network scientist. His research is fascinating, and it gives a surprising perspective on how we form deep relationships with others.
Great point that what deepens relationships is shared experiences:
Think about the 10 most important relationships in your life besides your immediate family. How did you meet them? It’s likely that you met many of them through shared experiences (college dorms, sports, collaborative teams, passion projects, etc).
But not all shared experiences are created equal…
This is why games and hobbies are so important.
i especially liked this point: "A weak network turns challenges into liabilities. A strong network turns challenges into opportunities.”
i have noticed this very thing in my own networks.
thanks for sharing, michael!
Thanks Emily! How have you noticed this principle in your own network?
currently, i am in the middle of a construction project gone awry. because i am new to town, my network was so weak at the beginning of this project, that my resources were limited and i did not get quality work. an accidental flood ensued, and the contractor abandoned the open project. so i had to change my approach. now, having actively used my ENTIRE network, not just the people i know in construction-related fields, my connections have come together and found me an amazing new construction team that's finishing the job!
Bill Gates and Warren Buffett bonding over bridge is a good illustration:
“The clue to the types of shared experiences that are most potent lies in the formation of the famous relationship between Bill Gates and Warren Buffett. They didn’t develop their relationship over a business deal as you might expect. They developed it through a shared activity that the two men shared a deep passion for — the game of bridge. Since then, they’ve become kindred spirits and collaborated on several levels. Warren Buffett has committed $40B+ of his wealth to the Gates Foundation.”
I wonder if they still play bridge together. I wonder how often they talk.
Thanks for your comments Adam! I also appreciate and respect your perspectives. I wonder if they still play together as well. I suspect they talk often.
Especially now that their financial fortunes are committed to the Gates Foundation.
Buffett must be on the Board of that, which increases the interactions.
I also note that Berkshire Hathaway did not buy Microsoft stock despite Buffett's clear respect for Gates and the fact that they played bridge (and apparently ping pong) together.