Carlos is my friend, and this post is awesome.

In order to to fully understand this post you must know the back story from approximately a year ago today. Last September, on my 21st birthday my friends and I went out downtown to 6th street to get unreasonably shitfaced as you do and at the first bar of the night we picked up, nay, stole a particularly good looking man from his crowd and he partied with us all night long, not just following us to each bar, but taking it upon himself to lead the way for a night of festivities in celebration of my 21st birthday, despite not even knowing me. He introduced himself as “Carlos, but it’s weird because I’m black,” and as a person who strives to be politically correct (sometimes), I preferred to refer to him as “African-American Carlos” but as I got drunker through the night and needed to save my energy for drinking and not taking the time to say a nine-syllable name, I followed suit as he encouraged and called him “Black Carlos.”

I'd have dis-avowed any knowledge of her, too.

I threw up my arms and screamed, “Black Carlos!!!!” In short, he was confused. He had no idea who we were.