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A Program That Aims to Lead to Post-Divorce Peace -

A Program That Aims to Lead to Post Divorce Peace NYTimes com


Stashed in: Relationships, Addiction, Hurt, Awesome, Psychology!

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“It implies there was an addiction,” he said. But it is exactly the program’s combination of tough love and big promises that seems to attract some Type A personalities, like a recently divorced, 44-year-old technology executive named George who did several one-on-ones with Divorce Detox last year.

George, who asked that his last name not be used for professional reasons, said that he felt sad, lonely and alienated after his breakup, but that the program “gave me a road map.”

And fast. “If I hadn’t done those things with them,” he said, “likely I would have figured it out, likely I would have read it in a book, likely someone would have taught me, but it would have taken me much longer.”

Sure enough, Michael D. Zentman, an associate clinical professor of psychology at Adelphi University, said men could benefit from trying therapy of any kind during a divorce.

“Men tend to want to fix what’s broken, which translates into diminishing their painful feelings and intolerable experiences of vulnerability,” he said. “Distraction is often the treatment of choice.”

I’m sorry? What did you say?

BEING a guy, I suppose I had long been wary about talking-it-out, something that I was quickly disabused of by Ms. Pescosolido, who asked me dozens of questions about my personal life: upbringing, romantic history, boxers or briefs, as well as my emotional state (raw) to my financial picture (cooked).

"Distraction is often the treatment of choice."

This makes a lot of sense to me.

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