These small, perfectly round, and seedless watermelons are nice, but sometimes I miss big, oblong watermelons with dark black seeds. Memories are not always accurate, but I'm sure watermelons used to taste better and every kid enjoys spitting out the seeds.

I'm sorry Japan, but these are not watermelons:

This is how I remember eating watermelon:

Popular varieties of heirloom watermelons include:

Jubilee:

Georgia Rattlesnake:

Moon and Stars:

Charleston Gray:

Black Diamond:

Congo:

Mother of God, that's a lot of melons.

A melon montage, per se.

nice melons, baby!

Speaking of "largest natural melons," the current world record holder is Norma Stitz.

"Norma Stitz"!

I see what you did there.

Here is how to grow your own square watermelon:

http://www.instructables.com/id/Grow-a-square-watermelon/

Oh, now I have to stash this.

These instructions teach you how to grow any similar fruit or vegetable into a cube.