My Husband Wants to Breastfeed Him: The Phenomenon Nobody Talks About But Everyone Googles
Adam Rifkin stashed this in Search
Charlotte Alter explains:
Some men are turned on, some are curious, and some are just trying to help out their wivesIt’s the suckle that dare not speak its name. In worldwide Google searches, “my husband wants me to breastfeed him” is a more popular search term than “my husband wants to separate” and “my husband wants a baby” combined.
Um, what? Seth Stephens-Davidowitz originally reported these numbers in the New York Times, and most of that breastfeeding search traffic is coming from India. While that doesn’t necessarily mean that breastmilk is becoming a delicacy in India, it does suggest a lot of interest. And it begs the question: is this really a thing?
Absolutely, says Dr. Wendy Walsh, a relationship expert and self-described “dairy queen” who nursed each of her children until they were 3. “Every breastfeeding mother I ever knew said their husband asked to drink it,” she says adding that the father of her child also asked to nurse once in a while.
Drinking human breast milk is enough of a niche fetish that there’s even awhole bar in Japan dedicated to it, where men can either buy shots of milk or get it straight from the nipple. Corky Harvey, who co-founded the Pump Station and Nurtery in Santa Monica, CA, said that when she asked nursing mothers whether their husbands ever tried to breastfeed, two women said they had heard of friends getting this request from their husbands. And one woman said she had been at a party where a man came up and asked if her husband like to “suckle on those breasts.”
“I think with a lot of men, there’s just a curiosity of what it tastes like, and what it would be like to nurse,” said Wendy Haldeman, who co-founded the Pump Station with Harvey. “Certainly men suck on nipples during sex, so they’re gonna get milk.”
But husband breastfeeding can be as much about utility as curiosity. “If the milk is backed up in the breast, and it’s very painful, and sometimes the baby can’t get it out and the pump can’t get it out,” she says. “And there have been times when the dads have been successful at clearing the blockage.” She added that the fathers’ teeth sometimes make this a bit complicated.
None of the lactation experts or OB-GYNs we spoke to said they had noticed a real adult breastfeeding trend in the United States, but they also weren’t particularly surprised to hear that it was a common search query.
“If you put women who are nursing together with partners who are having sex, then it’s bound to happen,” said Felina Rakowski-Gallagher, founder and president of the Upper Breast Side lactation center in New York City. “And if it’s bound to happen and there are no negative consequences, maybe it’s something that Mother Nature intended.”
But if asked, most American men say they’re definitely not into drinking milk directly from their wife’s breast. George Silva, a 42-year old banker from Caracas, Venezuela told me he “never considered” tasting his wife’s milk while she was nursing their two children, now 8 and 5. “I never heard of a man who wanted to try it,” his wife Lisa said.
“I had no urge whatsoever,” said Anthony, a 43-year-old New York wine salesman who asked that his last name not be used. “And there was tons of it.”
Perhaps husband breastfeeding is a global phenomenon that hasn’t caught on in the United States yet. “It’s happening around the world, not just in India, but inChina and Europe” said Dr. Diane Spatz, a professor at the University of Pennsylvania School of Nursing who also works at the Children’s Hospital of Philadelphia. “Men think, ‘oh there are all these health benefits of human milk, so if I’m a man, and I want to make myself healthier, then this is what I’m gonna do,’” she said, adding that the effects of breast milk on adults have not been extensively studied.
My husband wants me to Breastfeed him -- is this normal?
Absolutely normal. There is nothing wrong either psychologically or physically in doing this. If you are comfortable trying it, then go ahead, give it a shot!
Wow. I am very surprised by some of these answers. To you, and to those who have answered and said it is weird you are judging someone unnecessarily. Wishing to even lay down and suckle is PERFECTLY NORMAL male behavior. It is in no way unhealthy or perverted as I am sure most of you are taking it.
As far as the answer that said it is bad for baby, they could not be more wrong. The breast creates as much milk as needed. Your husband could drink his fill if he wished and there would still be plenty for baby.
And for the unsanitary remark... wow. Just how sanitary do you think the act of putting a baby's mouth (laden with bacteria) to a nipple to SUCK OUT milk produced by another's body (also, heavily laden with germs) is? It's not 'sanitary' which is how it is supposed to be. If you believe that sanitation is healthy you have no concept of microbiology or medicine.
Can I breast feed my husband?
Short answer: Of course you can. Breastfeeding your husband is not an unusual phenomenon.
Why breast feeding your husband isn't such a bad idea:
Apparently it can help:
And now for the real surprise ... why experts say letting dad suckle can actually HELP you breastfeed. And no, there's nothing kinky about it.
Ever had a plugged milk duct? It hurt, right? And the lactation consultant told you to nurse frequently to empty the breast of milk, to relieve the pressure and keep up your supply?
Well, if you've got a baby who isn't up for eating, but you need to get that milk out, you can ask dad. Yes, really. One breastfeeding expert actually told TIME there are times when baby and a pump can't get a blockage out, but Dad can.
More From The Stir: 25 Healing Uses for Breast Milk for Moms & Kids
If you really think about it, it makes sense. You can't tell baby how hard to suck. You can't increase the pressure of a breast pump. But you CAN tell an adult human being what you need done, and they can adjust accordingly. And if it hurts, well, why not let him try?
You can kill two bird with one stone -- relieving the pain and letting him satisfy his curiosity (because usually, that's all it is -- Dad wants to know what the heck it tastes like!).
There you go.