Parents Just Do Understand: A Guide to Which Rappers Your Kids Can Listen To
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Tupac Shakur is forever.
There are certainly instances when he can be a tad aggressive, but Tupac is absolutely necessary. There’s just no way around it. Not playing Tupac for your kids is the same as not letting them play in the sun or never giving them fruit; they probably won’t die, but they certainly won’t be better off than if you had.
Pre-2005 50 Cent vs. Post-2005 50 Cent
2003’s Get Rich or Die Tryin’ is a beautiful, perfectly timed, expertly created album. “Patiently Waiting,” “Many Men,” “Heat,” “Back Down” — 50 had more amazing songs on one album than he did for the rest of his career. That album was so good that 2005’s The Massacre, which actually was not bad, seemed like a total letdown at the time. That album was so good that The Massacre seemed like a total letdown at the time AND IT STILL SOLD OVER FIVE MILLION COPIES.
Pre-2001 Eminem includes The Slim Shady LP and The Marshall Mathers LP. That’s all you really need from Em. Those are his two sides. Everything since is really just a derivation. He’s zero fun. And I miss Fun Eminem so much. He used to say crazy stuff and everyone was like, “Hahaha, oh, Eminem.” Now he says crazy stuff and it’s just like, “Dude, what the fuck are you talking about?” and I understand that is a pretty terrible explanation of things, but it’s also kind of a perfect summation, too.
Here’s a crazy thing to think about: Kanye West has never — NEVER, not one single time — had a bad album. Every single album is great. EVERY SINGLE ALBUM. Do you understand how impossibly hard that is?