What Would Roman Do? | Roman Fitness Systems
Zach Johnston stashed this in life hacks
Don't agree with a bunch of them but some good ones in there (especially #65)
Still good two years later.
Worth reading again.
I had to start with #65:
End every single conversation by asking, “So, tell me: how can I help you?” Be sincere and mean this. Help however you can. This is the most important rule of all.
I think my favorite is #11:
You’re allowed to say no to shit you don’t like. I don’t generally believe in the idea of “obligation.” While there are things you “probably should” do, there is almost nothing you “need” to do. If I don’t like something, I will very rarely agree to do it. I have said “no” to everything you can imagine.For example, I no longer attend holidays with my extended family; I just don’t enjoy it (too much fighting), so I don’t go. Does my family complain? Sure. Do they try to make me feel guilty? Absolutely. Do I cave in? Fuck no. If you don’t like something, take a careful assessment of what going will cost you, and what it can do for you. If there’s no amount of “goodwill” that will make it seem like a good balance, don’t do it.
That one is worth practicing. I also like #33:
Answer all insults with a smile. Not everyone is going to like you, and some people will be vocal about it. There’s no point giving them the satisfaction of giving a shit.
Which leads us back to how to not give a fuck. :)
#11 is great but a little harder to pull off when the person you're saying no to actually does need your help
There's "no I won't help you" and then there's "no I won't do that, but talk to this person instead"...
And there's "no I won't do it, but you can do it yourself this way"...
Lots of possibilities. :)
This is an interesting list, but I love when people trot out the Washington's Rules thing, often presuming that he was such an extraordinary gentleman that even at a young age he was busy founding our country, when the reality can't be further from the truth.
In fact, it was a common practice among the upper classes of the period and earlier, that a young boy troubled with some social disorder, like say an explosive temper, a severe problem with 'extreme honesty', being easily annoyed by people, and a marked tendency to randomly say insulting things (all hallmarks of Geo. Washington even in his old age), should be assigned the task of writing or copying a treatise that is contradictory of and corrective for the bad behavior in question.
It was treated much like manuscript illumination, where the 'author' was intended to meditate upon what it was he was writing.
I think you're missing the point - as I said at the bottom of that post, I feel that writing your own list was enlightening and helped you define your own values.
Washington's list was a framing device, and was, as I also mentioned, the most recent inspiration.
You're not wrong in what you say, but I think you're missing that contextually, the reference made sense.
No. I got that point. I was making my own tangential observation.
I think John's right that it's a helpful exercise for anyone to make her own or his own list.
I'm putting it on my to do list and my bucket list to make a values list.
My favorite was #20: "If you go home with somebody and they don't have books, don't fuck them. -- John Waters" Unless, apparently, the lady in question is the best friend or sister or the worst enemy of a girl who cheated on you... then it seems that the book thing might be moot.
These days I'm using the book criterion to judge friendships, too.