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The top FBI hostage negotiator teaches us how to get what we want.

Stashed in: Influence!, Emotion, Decisions, Listen!, @bakadesuyo, Awesome, life

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Today I learned about negotation:

1. What’s your best alternative to a negotiated agreement, or BATNA? Know this going into a negotiation.

2. Use your emotions: "Human beings are incapable of being rational, regardless. There’s a lot of scientific evidence now that demonstrates that without emotions you actually can’t make a decision, because you make your decisions based on what you care about."

3. How to influence someone: "The idea is to really listen to what the other side is saying and feed it back to them. It’s kind of a discovery process for both sides. First of all, you’re trying to discover what’s important to them, and secondly, you’re trying to help them hear what they’re saying to find out if what they are saying makes sense to them."

4. The two biggest mistakes made in negotiation? "Neglect to pay attention to emotional factors, and really neglect to listen."

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