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How To Find Happiness In A Job You Hate

Stashed in: #happiness, Communication

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Sometimes, people make us angry or do things that aren’t fair. That’s when the ability to discuss issues calmly and rationally can be invaluable, Simko says. Often the people around you might not even realize that they’ve done something to upset you. Being able to calmly express yourself can make you feel better and can help co-workers understand you. Simko says, for many people, that kind of direct communication is hard, especially when it runs the risk of making others angry. But, the more you practice speaking your mind, it’s possible to get comfortable with it over time and be able to speak your mind more freely.

Maybe this belongs here:  A Renegade's Approach to Feedback.

For me, a lot of the stress vanished when I began seeking feedback voluntarily, and then dividing people's comments into three buckets, as follows:

  • One third of outsiders' input proves instantly useful. Their remarks are so smart and obvious that all we can do is say "Thanks!" and put those ideas into action.
  • Many other comments are directionally helpful but shouldn't be regarded as the last word. Such critics draw attention to areas where our work isn't as good as it could be. That said, they may not have a solution, or their suggested remedy might be worse than the problem. In such cases, we needn't battle over areas of disagreement. It's enough to thank people for drawing attention to an issue that we may end up fixing in an entirely different way.
  • As for the final scraps of feedback: So what! Let common sense prevail here. We're allowed to filter other people's input,discarding nudges that are just plain wrong. This is the right bucket, too, for situations where others push their own agendas so hard that they can't see different paths of getting to a good outcome.

I like it! Feedback seems to be better swallowed when we asked for it in the first place! And your three buckets are great. I am putting your suggestion in my Bucket #1! :-)

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