10 methods nasty people use and how to avoid them
emily kate moon stashed this in communication
not the most positive article (and it's full of spelling, grammar, and punctuation errors!) but it's always good to be prepared for mean people!
and yes, of course, the best method is to avoid them altogether, but sometimes they're family or neighbors or coworkers... then you need to know how to handle them.
Yeah, unfortunately you can't always avoid. Learning to deal is a good life strategy.
this one is a doozy!
9. They Build You Up, Then Cut You Down
Many invalidators like to build you up so that you grow dependent on them. They make it seem like they are always there for you and that you can always share your innermost feelings.
Whenever you feel self-conscious or anxious, however, the invalidator will draw your attention to the negative aspects about yourself. This way, they can pull you down so that they feel more superior, making you feel like you need them.
No one can make you feel bad but you.
that is very true! eleanor roosevelt has a nice quote about that.
she did have a way with words, didn't she?
Watch out for this one, too.
5. They Generalize And Exaggerate The Truth
Be careful of generalizations. An invalidator will use generalizations as a way of exaggerating small truths. For example, if you forgot to clean the house, an invalidator might say, ”You never help me” (Translation: you forgot to clean). ”You’re useless”. (You forgot to clean).
Again, this is an attack on your self-esteem instead of the real problem. The problem is the house isn’t clean. The problem is not that you don’t help, or are useless.