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Good Parenting Skills: 7 Research-Backed Ways to Raise Kids Right

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Lesson #1: Praise kids for something they can easily control — the amount of effort they put in.

This teaches them to persist and that improvement is possible.

To teach our kids to persist, consider the discovery of a Search Activity, an innate quality of humans and animals. Each of us apparently possesses different amounts of Search Activity and the level of it largely defines how we deal with the obstacles and points of stress in our lives.

Search Activity theory claims that the stress causes mental and psychosomatic disorders only if a person gives up the Search. Apparently when we can't exhibit Search in a waking state, we even try to compensate for it in dreams. Researchers suggest that the bulk of our Search Activity quality is formed in the very early childhood.

So what does it mean for us as parents? We can put our kids in situations where they regularly try something new, that is where they can't rely on "already acquired adaptations". The process of search is more important than its pragmatic outcome to our health. Kind of goes hand in hand with "It is a Journey not a Destination" maxim, doesn't it?

I can vouch for this theory as I conducted the Search Activity induction experiments on my own kids, and the kids are alright :-)

Lesson #2: Make Sure They Get Their Sleep.

Losing an hour of sleep reduces your sixth-grader’s intelligence to that of a fourth-grader.

Lesson #3: Kids want to please you. Tell them that the truth makes you happy – not just the right answer —  and you’re more likely to get the truth.

What’s a quick trick for getting your kid to be honest?

Say:  “I’m about to ask you a question. But before I do that, will you promise to tell the truth?”

Lesson #4: Set ground rules and be consistent.

The hardest thing to do as a parent is always one of the most important.

Eric Barker also recommends keeping a gratitude journal:

I’ve posted before about the incredible benefits of keeping a gratitude journal

It works for kids too.

Students who kept a gratitude journal were happier, more optimistic, and healthier.

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